Turning the Town Upside Down
by Vii Vii Tairii
Summary: Twins apparently run in the Hawke family as Carver and Bethany aren't the only ones. They have two older sisters that are twins: Devi and Althea. f!mage!Hawke/Anders f!rogue!Hawke/Fenris
1. New Beginnings

A/N: There's going to be a major time skip because Act 1 annoys me. I hate playing through it, I don't want to write it. I'll explain relationships as we go. And I realize DA2 rogues can't really be Rangers, but I like Rangers too much not to have the rogue be one. She'll just call more unusual animals. The mage is also going to be a shape shifter, with some alterations.

'thoughts'

time skip

Devi and Althea landed in a dark room, with the only light coming from the full moon directly above them. A person walked in front of them, but kept his or her features shadowed.

"The time has come for you to begin your own adventure. The place and time is set. Your roles as well. Chose your class and you may begin." The shadow said.

Three panels rose in front of the girls. On them were pictures. One was a shield, another, a dagger, and the third a staff.

The red haired Devi chose the dagger, her ice blue eyes shining in excitement, while the black haired Althea chose the staff, white eyes lit with fire.

"And so your adventure begins." The shadow stated.

The girls were enveloped in a bright light and then they were whisked away.

Devi woke first and it was to screams of terror and pain. She bolted from her bed and flipped Althea out of hers.

"The hell was that for Vi?" She yelled.

"Something's going on. We have to move." Devi responded.

"Oh alright." Althea said, hearing the screams.

Their mother, Bethany and Carver burst into the room.

"Oh thank goodness you two are alright." Their mother, Leandra said as she hugged them.

"Mother we have to get out of here." Said Carver.

"Of course." She said.

They grabbed what belongings they could and fled from the house. On their way out of the little town they encountered what could only be described as zombies, only with better combat skills. Devi pulled out her bow, knocked an arrow, and let it fly….straight into its face.

"Devi-1. Darkspawn-0." She said.

"Vi, there's more." Althea said.

"I know, but I thought you'd want to have some fun with that fire of yours." Devi stated.

"Oh. Well then thank you." Althea said.

She raised her staff and fireballs rained down on the Darkspawn. Most of them fell and those that survived were cut down by their brother's Greatsword.

"Happiness!" Devi exclaimed.

"Vi."

"Yes Thea."

"We have to run."

"Why?"

"There's about fifty more behind us."

"Oh. Ok."

They continued running and fighting until they came upon a ginger fighting to protect a wounded Templar from Darkspawn.

"We should help." Devi said.

"But it's a Templar." Bethany said.

"And your point?" Althea questioned.

"He's going to try and kill the two of us."

"Bullshit!"

after fight

"The order dictates." The Templar said.

"Ok. You were right." Althea told Bethany.

"I'm Aveline Vallen and this is my husband Wesley."

Althea glared at the Templar.

"We can kill each other later." Devi said and pulled them along.

At the end of their journey, Althea saved Carver from being crushed by an Ogre, Aveline had to kill Wesley due to the taint, and they, with the exception of Leandra, had to join a group of mercenaries in order to get into Kirkwall and live with their uncle.

4 years

"Vi, why can't we just tell them to meet us at the Hanged Man?" Althea asked.

"Because this is much more fun Thea." Devi said.

"But you know I don't like some of these people." She said.

"Alright fine." Devi consented, "You get a hold of Aveline, Anders, Isabella, and Varric. I'll handle the others."

"But that leaves me with more people." She whined.

"Isabella and Varric are in the same place." Devi said, sighing.

"Fine! Be that way!" Althea yelled and stomped away.

'From the way she acts you would think she's the youngest.' Devi thought.

Althea's POV

'I'll show her.' Althea thought, 'I'll make sure I'm home before her.'

She walked up the many stairs to Viscounts Keep and entered the building that housed the Viscount and the city guard. She made her way to the barracks and to the Guard Captain's office, where she knew Aveline would be. Aveline might as well have been a Hawke with how close she was to the family, and the protective older sister role she took within it.

"Hello Leena." Althea said to announce her presence.

"Why do you insist on calling me that?" Aveline said, exasperated.

"Eh, I want to." She said, "So how have you been?"

"Busy, you and your sister just love to rile people up. Especially anti-Fereldans." She said.

"Aveline, we're Hawkes. Do you really expect us to do anything else?" She retorted.

Devi's POV

'I suppose I should go see Fenris first. Then it'll just go in order and I won't be running around like a headless chicken.' Devi thought.

She walked past the Chantry and up the stairs that lead to the Hightown estates. When she reached Fenris' door she didn't bother to knock. She just walked in announcing herself as she went. This was a kind of routine with them. So long as you announced yourself you could just walk right in. While She and Fenris got along, he and Althea did not. They were constantly at each others throats. It mostly had to do with the fact that Althea was a mage and Fenris disliked mages. Alright, dislike is an understatement.

Devi found Fenris in the room he claimed as his own, as shown by the fact that he moved the important furniture into it: bed, dining table, two chairs, and two benches by the fireplace.

"'Ello, friend." She greeted.

"Devi." He nodded at her.

That was another thing. Her sister was either called Hawke or Witch. Devi was called by her name. It wasn't just Fenris who called Devi by her name either. Everyone did, with the exception of Varric who called her Winter, due to her eye color.

"So what's new on your end?" She asked.

"Absolutely nothing." He said, "No sign of Danarius since I met you."

"Well that's good right?" Devi asked.

"I'm not entirely sure." He said.

"Well we'll be out there slicing people down again soon, so maybe we'll take him down." She said.

"You're a good friend, Devi." He said.

"You say that now." She said jokingly.

Althea's POV

'And now I'll go to Darktown.' She thought, 'I'll show Vi who's smarter.'

She descended into the depths of Darktown to Anders' clinic. Out of everyone Althea had to be closest to Anders. They could often be found talking and teasing one another. She knocked twice on his door.

"Who's there?" He asked.

"Ketchup." She said.

"Ketchup who?" He called, confused.

"I thought I'd come by to ketchup with you." She said and giggled, "It's Althea."

He opened the door and ushered her inside.

"What is with you and those blighted knock knock jokes?" He asked.

"Well you set yourself up for it every time." She said, "It's not my fault."

"I'm sure you could resist if you tried." He said.

"But it's a part of me." She said, "And you love me."

"That's debatable. Why are you here?" He asked.

"Well Vi and I decided it's time to get back to work. Sitting up in Hightown all day is boring." She stated.

"I'll have bandages ready." He sighed.

"You know us so well!" She exclaimed.

Devi's POV

Devi walked up to the doors of the Chantry and slipped inside. Her ears immediately picked up the sound of arguing.

'How can Chantry people always be at each other's throats? It makes no sense. They're supposed to be all make peace not war.' She mused.

"You rang Sebastian?" She inquired when she was close enough.

"Devi!" He exclaimed, "Yes, I found out that the Harrimans hired the Flint Mercenaries. I want to know why, but I dare not go alone."

"Well, no need to ask. Of course I'll help." She said.

"Then I'll just accompany you until we go, if that's alright?" He said.

"Sure. I just have to go check up on Merrill and we can go interrogate them." She said, "I'll send Sarika with a message to Fenris and have him come with us."

She summoned a red falcon, wrote a note, and tied it to the bird named Sarika.

"Onward to Merrill's" She said and the two headed toward Merrill's place.

Althea's POV

Althea approached the Hanged Man with caution. There's no telling what goes on within at any given moment. The moment she stepped in, she spotted Isabella at the bar. Now Isabella and the oldest pair of Hawke twins got along very easily. Their minds practically shared a gutter.

"Hey Izzy!" Althea yelled.

"Hello, Hawke." Isabella greeted.

"Where's the Dorf?" She asked.

"In his room like always." She replied shaking her head.

"EW! He's doin the nasty with a crossbow!" Althea yelled.

Varric walked down the steps.

"Why do you always assume that, Hawke?" He asked.

"Gutter." Althea and Isabella replied.

"Be ready to kill stuff." Althea said, "So we need your room for meetings. So no doin nasty with Bianca. Bianca no doin nasty with Dorf. At least Bianca will listen."

Althea nodded and headed back to the house.

Devi's POV

"Yo, Mare! We got shit to do!" Devi yelled walking into Merrill's house.

Merrill was an in between with the Hawkes. Devi was ok with her. She was a blood mage, but she was also a ditz. Althea, on the other hand, completely hated her.

"Oh! We're going on a mission?" She asked.

"Yup. We're meeting Fenris outside his place then we're going to help Sebastian interrogate the Harrimans!" Devi replied.

"Alright." She said.

The three of them returned to Hightown and went to meet up with Fenris.

Narrator's POV

'I knew I'd beat her home!' Althea thought.

Just then Devi entered the estate covered in blood and reeking of demons.

"GODDAMMIT!" She yelled "I knew it was too good to be true. Why didn't you wait for me?"

"One, I wanted to get it done with. Two, you take forever, and three, Fenris was with us." Devi said by way of explanation.

"Stupid Glowstick." Althea muttered.

The others trailed in behind Devi.

"I heard that Witch." Fenris said glaring at Althea.

"Don't make me turn into kitty." She warned.

"Children behave." Devi said.

They both glared at her.

"I'm not a child." They both said, "She/He is."

"Don't make me separate you two!" She warned.

"But the Glowstick might like it." Althea muttered.

"Want to find out?" Fenris asked.

"No doin the nasty on the living room floor!" Althea said.

"Ok!." Devi exclaimed, grabbed his arm, and dragged him to her room.

"EW!" Althea yelled.

The door to Devi's room shut and all could hear the sound of the lock clicking behind them.

"EW!" Althea shouted again.

Devi's POV

"Do you have any threes?" Devi asked.

"Go Fish." Fenris replied, "Why are we doing this again?"

A muffled "EW!" was heard.

"To mess with my sister." She replied as she kicked over a chair.

"EW!" was heard more clearly.

"Why do you enjoy this so much?" He asked.

"Because I have get her back for short sheeting my bed…and putting honey in it." Devi said glaring at a burnt chair in the corner, "and that too."

"Well I can see why you'd be upset." He said, "Do you have any fives?"

"YES!" she screamed breathlessly.

"EW!" was squealed and a door was slammed.

Devi chuckled and handed over the five.

"I win." He said.

Devi smacked her forehead.

"One pair doesn't mean you win." she said.

"Oh. Well how do you win?" He asked.

"By having the most pairs when the deck's gone." She stated.

"Oh. Well ok then." He said and pushed the desk.

"You do realize she's gone right?" Devi said.

"But the others aren't." He stated, "Have any threes?"

Devi banged her head against the wall and groaned.

"You have got to be kidding me." She sighed.

Althea's POV moments earlier.

After the first bang, Althea turned around to see Anders walking in the door.

"I heard Devi went on a mission. Who's hurt and which limb is she missing?" He asked.

"Well she wasn't missing any limbs…" Althea trailed off.

A breathless "Yes!" was heard from Devi's room.

"EW!" she squealed and slammed the door to the study as she walked in.

A moment later Anders, Merrill, and Sebastian followed.

"Who is she up there with?" Anders asked.

"THE DAMN GLOWSTICK!" She yelled, "He's up there taking her virginity."

Anders' eyes got wide and to prove the point a bang and a groan was heard.

"I cannot fix that." He said looking at the many rolls of bandages he brought.

"No shit Sherlock." Althea said.

"Who's Sherlock?" Anders asked with a grin.

"I'm not even surprised anymore." She said.

Another bang was heard followed by a manly cry.

"By Andraste!" Sebastian exclaimed.

Devi's POV

"And that is where I draw the line." Devi said as she tackled Fenris away from her bed, "You are not messing with my sheets!"

"But you want it to be believable right?" He asked.

"Not like that though!" She said, "I want to be able to say 'Hey we were messing with you.'"

"But where's the fun in that?" He smirked and turned back to the bed.

Devi sighed and gave up. Then smirked.

"Alright." She said, "But if you're so intent on making it believable…..take off your shirt."

He looked at her in surprise.

"What?" He asked stopping.

"Look. Althea will come in here eventually to make sure we're not….you know." She said, "So we make it look completely like something happened."

He turned back to the bed and continued messing with the sheets. As he was doing that Devi stripped off her own shirt and tackled him.

"What are you doing?" He said as he tried to look anywhere but at her.

"Making it believable." She said and ripped off his shirt, "Now go to sleep."

She rolled under the covers and pulled him under with her.

"How is this making it believable?" He asked.

"Well, by stripping off our shirts and getting under the covers it makes it look as though we're naked as the days we were born. Therefore, it's completely believable." She explained.

"What about the lack of other clothing on the floor?" He asked.

"Eh. She won't get that far. She'll be screaming "ew" and "mother" long before she notices that there's no other clothing on the floor."

"This is Hawke we're talking about." He said.

"Good point." She said.

She then continued on to summon her Drake, Tobias. She directed him to sit right in front of the still locked door.

"And now she can't get in!" Devi said happily, though tiredly.

"Doesn't that defeat the purpose?" He asked.

"Shhhh. Go seep." She said already halfway there.

"Devi." He said nudging her.

"Shhhhhhhh." She said putting a finger to his lips and cuddling up to him, "I seepy."

Althea's POV

"It's official. He's never letting my sister out." Althea said worriedly.

"I'm sure she's fine." Anders said.

"She is NOT fine. The Glowstick dragged her up there, took her virginity, and now won't let her out of the room." She said, beginning to pace.

"Thea." Anders warned, "Don't forget. You're always jumping to conclusions that aren't true."

"She's already lied." Merrill said, "Devi dragged Fenris."

Anders looked at her in shock.

"Same thing." She snapped.

"Maybe you need some sleep." Sebastian said.

"And maybe you need some sex!" She turned on him.

"Andraste woman. I'm a brother of the Chantry." He said.

"They need sex too!" She yelled and threw up her hands, "You know what. Leave. NOW!"

Everyone left with the exception of Anders, who gave her the bandages.

"Will this help?" He teased.

She glared at him. Anders put on a happy-go-lucky grin.

"Kitty?" He asked with puppy dog eyes.

"I don't fall for puppy eyes." She said.

"But they're kitty eyes." He pouted.

"I don't fall for them either." She said.

"What if I gave you a hug?" He asked, still pouting.

"A hug?" She asked.

"Yup." He nodded.

"Fine." She caved.

"YAY!" He said and gave her a big bear hug.

She broke the hug and turned into her Tiger form.

"That is not a cat." He said pointing at her.

Althea nods her head.

"Is there a different kitty?" He asked hesitantly.

She nodded again and turned back into human.

"For the record," She started, "They don't call it a big cat for nothing."

She then morphed into her panther form.

"That is also not a kitty." He said with widened eyes.

Althea shrugged, flopped to her side, and nudged his hand.

"You want me to pet you?" He asked extremely confused.

She nodded her head.

"Well ok then." He said and started petting her.

'Oh yeah. Right there. Over. Over. There ya go.' She thought and began purring, 'I'll kill Devi later…..and Glowstick.'

A/N: Please remember that with the influence of the two of them. Certain characters will be almost completely OOC.


	2. The Chase for the Truth

A/N: Welcome back. Hope you enjoyed the first crazy chapter! The craziness will only continue and maybe even get worse. Now, on with your scheduled story.

Narrator's POV

Leandra Hawke awoke and began with her daily routine. When she went downstairs though she was met with an odd sight. On the floor of her study was her eldest child, in panther form, being cuddled by her apostate friend Anders. Leandra cleared her throat and Althea's ears perked up. She shifted her head and opened one eye to look at her mother. She then gave a soft growl.

"Before you get defensive, I'd thought you'd like to know there's a mage draped over top of you." She stated.

Althea shrugged and closed her eye.

"And I believe he's drooling." She said.

Althea jumped up and Anders hit the ground with an audible thud and groan. He opened his eyes to see a human Althea glaring at her mother.

"Liar." She said, to Anders, "Do you need a bandage?"

"No I think I'm good." He responded, sitting up and rubbing the back of his head.

"Thea, dear, where's your sister?" Leandra asked.

"Depends." Anders said, "Is her door still locked?"

"Why would her door be locked?" Her mother asked.

"Stupid Glowstick." Althea muttered.

"What does your elven friend have to do with her door being locked?" She asked.

"He's Devi's friend, mother not mine." She said with a glare, "and think about it."

There was a pause. It seemed the very world was put on hold.

"He's dead." Leandra said and marched upstairs to Devi's bedroom.

She banged on the door.

"Open this door right now Devi Laverna Hawke!" She exclaimed, "Althea Nyx Hawke, get rid of this damn door!"

Devi's POV

Devi groaned and burrowed her face further into her moving pillow.

'Wait.' She thought, 'Pillows don't move.'

She opened one eye and found a shirtless sleeping elf.

'Why is it I get more drunk on sleep deprivation than alcohol?' She asked herself.

"Open this door right now Devi Laverna Hawke!" She exclaimed, "Althea Nyx Hawke, get rid of this damn door!"

Devi groaned and closed her eye. Unfortunately, she woke Fenris.

"Why is your mother yelling?" He asked sleepily.

"Door locked, barricaded, your in here, go back to sleep." She attempted to explain and cuddled up to him more.

"Ok." He said and drifted back off.

Althea's POV

"YES! FIRE!" Althea yelled happily with her hands in the air and began doing a happy dance, "Watch and learn bitch."

"Language!" Her mother said.

"Details." She said waving her mother's scolding off.

"Thea the house is made of wood." Anders said.

"And your point?" She asked.

"Fire eats wood." He said.

"I can control it." She said, sticking out her tongue.

Narrator's POV

Once the door was completely consumed by fire, they were met with the scale rimmed eye of Tobias.

"I can't burn that." Althea whined.

"Aw. You do care about your sister." Anders said.

"Nope. He's fire resistant." She said, "I would know."

"Your sister is in so much trouble." Leandra said.

Althea did a happy dance.

"You're in trouble too Nyx." She said.

"Why?" Althea asked.

Leandra looked pointedly at Anders and the charred remains of the door frame.

"That was an accident!" She said, "And you told me to get rid of it!"

Devi's POV

"And you told me to get rid of it!"

Devi growled.

"She burned down my door." She muttered.

Tobias fixed her with his other eye and grinned.

"Stop grinning!" Was a muffled response.

"Good boy." Devi praised and curled back up on Fenris to sleep.

3 hours

Devi woke fully rested and looked up to the completely awake Fenris.

"How long have you been up?" She asked.

"I woke at the Witch's many curses for the Drake not burning." He replied, "It's quite amusing because your mother keeps reprimanding her."

"I can see that. You stay here." She said, "I'll handle this."

Devi walked over to Tobias, who moved his head back just enough that they could see her face, but not enough to get into the room.

"Devi Laverna Hawke, you are in so much trouble!" Her mother scolded.

"Mother, I'm twenty-four." She said, "I'm allowed to make my own decisions. And if you're going to get upset with me, maybe you should know how Althea ogles Anders' ass at all hours of the day."

At her statement, Anders blushed like a Chantry boy, Althea glared at her sister, and Leandra turned her anger onto her eldest.

"My work here is done." Devi said and Tobias moved back in place in front of the doorway.

Devi crawled back onto the bed and looked at Fenris.

"Now what do we do?" She asked.

"Um…could you put a shirt back on?" He asked avoiding her eyes, "It's distracting."

"Oh, so it's distracting you huh?" She said with a smirk, "Maybe I shouldn't put a shirt on then."

Althea's POV

'Crap. Crap. Crap. Fuck. Shit. Damn it all to hell.' Althea thought, 'I'm going to kill her. WOLF!'

She morphed into her wolf form and darted behind Anders. She glared and growled at her mother, who fixed her with the 'you've got a lot of explaining to do' stare. For his part, Anders stood there, torn between running away, defending Althea, and blushing to his roots. Instead, he just stood there with his mouth shut.

Hanged Man

"So that's what happened when you went home?" Varric asked Althea the next day.

"Yeah." She said, "I really hate my sister right now."

"Well, you have to admit you're not very good at being subtle." He stated, "I'm only surprised your mother hadn't caught on sooner."

"Yeah, Vi's the subtle one." She said, glaring at the floor.

"Though I have to say, I never thought the elf had it in him." He commented.

"Please don't go there. I've had enough scarring mental images." She muttered.

Devi's POV

'I wonder how Thea's doing with Varric. He's probably going to exaggerate the story.' She thought, 'Though, I doubt he'll have to do much exaggerating. Things got weird fast.'

Devi grinned as she walked along the Wounded Coast with Isabella, Sebastian, and Anders.

"So…..what happened in the study?" She asked Anders.

"What are you talking about?" He asked in return.

"When I was otherwise….preoccupied." She said, "What happened?"

"Nothing happened."

"That's not what I heard."

"How would you know? You were off sleeping with Fenris."

"Now this I have to hear about!" Isabella exclaimed.

Meanwhile, Sebastian was sulking.

"Is Hawke right?" He asked.

Devi looked at him confused.

"About what?" She asked.

"About the Chantry. Is she right?" He asked.

"Yes. Yes she is." Anders said.

Isabella and Devi looked at each other and shrugged. It was apparently a man thing.

"You thinking what I'm thinking?" Devi asked Isabella.

"We tie up Sebastian and have our wicked way with him?" Isabella mused.

"That's all you." She said, "But we do need them to tell us what's going on, so we will need some rope."

"I always carry rope." Isabella said.

"Handy." Devi nodded.

Narrator's POV

Althea walked into the study to find Anders and Sebastian tied to chairs with ball gags in their mouths.

"What kind of kinky orgy is this?" She asked, "And why is Anders a part of it? You know I have di…..I mean…..what's going on?"(1)

"We're tryin to figure out what you said to that one!" Devi said pointing a dagger at Sebastian.

"When?" She asked.

"In the study!" Devi responded, "When I was….preoccupied."

"How should I know?" Althea shrugged, "I was tired."

"Shit." Isabella said.

"What did she say Anders?" Devi questioned him, "You were here all night!"

"Why do I miss all the juicy bits of information?" Isabella whined.

"Not now Izzy!" Devi said.

"Vi?"

"Yes Thea?"

"He's gagged. He can't answer."

"Oh!"

Devi ripped the ball gag off with a loud "OW!" from Anders and pointed her dagger at him.

"What did she say?" She growled.

"That hurt you know." He said glaring.

"Don't care." She said, "Now tell me."

"All she said was that Sebastian and the rest of the Chantry needed to get laid." He said, "Can I go now?"

"I don't know." She said, "Thea?"

"Huh?" She said looking up from the fireplace.

"Can Anders leave?" Devi asked.

"Fuck no." Althea responded automatically, "I mean…..sure. He has legs. Doesn't he? He does right? Please tell me didn't lose his legs! I need tho…I mean he needs those."

Althea looked around with shifty eyes.

"I'll be…..in my room." She said, slowly edging towards the stairs, "Bye!"

She bolted up the stairs and slammed her door shut.

"I hope your not fantasizing again!" Devi yelled up to her sister, then turned to Anders, "And yes. It would be about you."


End file.
